Is that 'perfect mom' out there?
In our Mom and Baby session the other day there was a presenter that joined us sharing her personal experience with the "perfect mom myth!"
What I am hoping all moms gained from this topic is the awareness that there is no perfect mom out there. It seems that often, as first time moms, we feel like we are failing because we don’t know what we are doing! This is what I believe is so magical about being a woman, a mother. Our instincts are there to guide us, our emotions and ability to communicate are there to help build a perfect mother for that child.
The discussion was helpful when the presenter shared that there would be days when you thought that perhaps becoming a mom was not the greatest idea for you or you just want to sleep and want your baby to quit crying! There is no perfect mother out there because we all have those days.
At that Mom and Baby class, we all shared a moment that was less then perfect for us, a time when we felt unsure of what to do or how to feel. One by one, we broke down those expectations and validated those feelings because we are the ones who had created that “perfect” mom in our head! We are the ones that watch the mom with three kids all dressed nicely, looking put together while out shopping for clothes, for herself!
And you wonder, "How does she do it? Oh, I wish I could be like her."
Sometimes we are our worst critics. Little do you know that just half an hour before she was at home trying to put makeup on while her a toddler was sticking his hands in the toilet and her daughter trying to put on makeup all over her face. The mom wants to get out the door, but she forgot that the baby still needed to eat!
But she is a perfect mom because she is trying her best. She has found the support she needs. That’s all. Her house is not always spotless, her clothes are not always folded and her children don’t always say, "Please." The time she makes for herself may not always be by herself! Her only personal time may be right then and there, wandering through the store looking at clothes for herself.
There may be days that you never feel like the "perfect mom," but the main thing is that your baby is safe, clean and fed. And that you are safe, clean and fed too! Find the support you need to share your good times and your bad. Break down that “perfect mom” stereotype and know that most of us are just trying to do our best!
You have children that are loved, hugged and kissed everyday. That is all that matters.