Don’t judge a mom, offer support instead

My worth as a mother is not determined by my feeding choices, how well my baby sleeps at night or how clean my house is. When my baby cries in a busy restaurant, it is not a reflection of my abilities as a parent, nor will I apologize for it. Where my baby sleeps and what I feed my baby is no one else’s concern.

All too often our society quickly and harshly judges mothers for the choices they make about their bodies and their children. Being a mother is tough enough as it is, without the glares, snickers, and whispers that tend to occur amongst mothers, grandmothers and the population in general.

I will shamefully admit that shortly after my daughter was born, I was insecure. I was a first-time mom trying to navigate foreign waters and I worried about what other people were thinking and saying. My insecurity, while no excuse, led me to judge the choices that other mothers were making. It took the support of several amazing mommas to show me that we are all doing the best that we can.

Each and every one of us is trying desperately to do right by our children, while balancing an enormous mound of responsibility. Sometimes we forget, as mothers and as a society, that what we need most of all is support, support for the choices that we have made.

My support came in the form of old friends and new moms, just like me, navigating foreign waters. I will be forever grateful to Mommy Connections and Mother Haven for the connections and comfort I received.

In those dark moments, when you feel lonely, vulnerable and overwhelmed, as though you are making every wrong choice possible, remember:

You are strong.

You are incredible.

You are not alone.